The Swindling Canoeist and Other Criminal Acts

Recently I’ve been reading an article about a skip-tracer with some of my business students. Basically, it’s about this guy who tracks down people who try to skip out of town and leave debts behind, etc. There’s one part about a guy who committed life insurance fraud in a death he faked in a canoe. The line which caused much consternation among my students was,

“…much in the news since swindling canoeist John Darwin and his wife Anne were jailed last year…”

We had to break each word down and discuss it for a long time. Finally one student threw up her hands and moaned, explaining to me in Spanish her understanding of the article—a man in a canoe, rowing around, cheating people out of their hard-earned money. We had a good laugh once it was straightened out.

Moving along. Since I essentially grew up in a house, I’m not familiar with the ups and downs of apartment life. Overall, I like the connected sense. Hearing snatches of other people’s music, knowing when someone is putting in a new cupboard, etc. I especially like the baby and his grandma who tickles him so hard that he bounces her name when he’s trying to get it out. However, there is one thing I do not like. And that is the lifestyle of my neighbors on the other side of my headboard. I used to have neighbors who loved each other very much. Several times a week, they loved each other very much. Such things can be ignored with a little help from music in the headphones. However, they must have moved because that room is now the entertainment room for a family who does NOT love each other so much. In fact, they fight a lot and watch TV till very late. Even with all this considered, it wasn’t until they downloaded Instant Messenger that I got truly annoyed. Bee-dee-doop. Bee-dee-doop. *Low, vicious grumbling from my side of the wall*

I take comfort in the fact that I have taken revenge on basically any past or potential enemies in my apartment building with one simple purchase. I’ve been wanting to do it for a long time, and finally I got so jealous of one of my students that I just went out and bought one. I am now the proud owner of a Hohner Recorder. Bam. You may look for an album titled, “The Musical Stylings of Kate” on iTunes any day now. Later, when I want to appeal to a wider, more hip-hop style audience, I will produce an album called, “The Musical Stylings of K-Dub.” First, I have to figure out how to stay in the same octave for the whole song. I have already taught myself at least four, maybe 5 songs. Parents, you can look forward to such musical gems as, “Mary Had a Little Lamb” and “Ode to Joy” when I’m living at home looking for a job.

In final news, just in time for Kimberlea’s arrival, I have contracted a head cold. I’d like to know which of my students to blame, but they’ve all been sick within the past month, so I just don’t know. I plan to take it easy so that I will be ready for our big shindig in Valencia. Google “Las Fallas”…it’s pretty good. And, lucky for me, I have the nicest roommate in the world who supports me in my whiny, snot-ridden state and doesn’t mind if I use roughly 50% of our toilet paper supply to empty my nose.