The Disappointment of Turkeys in Adult Life

Ria: "Yeah! It was like, when you were little, turkeys were these magical creatures that brought you all this happiness, and then you grow up, and you're like, 'What?'"
Kate: "I know, I used to think turkeys were a lot cuter and then you see them and you realize they're really ugly."
Ria: "I know."
Kate: "Wait. *pauses* I never actually thought turkeys were magical creatures that brought me all this happiness. I just didn't know they were so ugly."

The way it is

Squadron: It's time for an update.

Some changes in the house. We have secured a chore chart complete with photos. Shuffling the housemates around a bit and moving Kyla out next month (something about buying her own house and not wanting to pay on two things whatwhat), but the oh-so-glamourous Alli Bedalli will be moving in by June. Fantastico.

I continue to work with children who are unsure if Satan and I are two separate beings, or, in fact, the same entity. Occasionally the sun peeks through the clouds and they are shocked to discover that I am a very nice human being indeed.

I attended a wedding for a co-worker in the fine town of Sweet recently. You know you live in a small town when you have to cross a cattle guard to get to your church. A good time nonetheless.

Let's end with some quotes from work, shall we?
[From the slightly-young-in-the-head-and-emotions 14 year old as he looks out the window pondering life] "Ms. Kate?" "Yeah." "What's so great about maturity, anyway?"
[From the 9 year old exuberantly trying to volunteer information during the Q&A session in a religious class] Teacher - "Mecca...where IS Mecca?" Kid - "It's a mineral!!!"

Unexpected

This blog is dedicated to the sunny hilarity that is my roommate Emely. I have come to have a new appreciation for her and the unexpected things that come flying out of her mouth. Some recent, enthusiastic examples:

"I just LOVE to see things growing! I just look at it and I'm like, 'Good job! Way to grow!'"

*Breathlessly* "Katelin! I just found the most perfect book. It describes me. I read it to my first graders."
Me - "Yeah?! What's it called?"
Em - "Grandfathers Journey."

I have never met anyone who congratulates things for participating in natural phenomena, i.e. plants growing, finding her dog drier after letting the dog lay on a rug for a while, etc., but I feel it's probably a pretty good outlook to have. So, Em, good job on being alive. I appreciate you despite never having eaten your pistachio salad.

My Dear Acquaintance

Greetings from the hearth fire of my home which actually does not have a fire and I'm at my desk anyway.

I recently purchased a Roald Dahl calendar for 50% off and as I was updating it, flipping through last years' calendar, it occurred to me that this year has been quite the ride. Let's recap, shall we?

*I have to confess, I rang in 2009 in the most badass way to-date. I was in the center of Spain in a huge plaza with thousands of people doing the equivalent of the ball drop in NY. I managed to conquer the tradition of eating 12 grapes before the end of the 12 strokes of midnight as fireworks were shooting off everywhere.
*I spent 5 more months in Spain and a couple weeks in Italy. I got to see things and visit places that used to just exists in textbooks. :) All with Astin. All of it a huge growing process. Lots of painful, some of it really frustrating. Some of it ridiculously hilarious, and much of it pleasant. It left me wondering...what next. That had been my dream since I was wrong, it was the proof I needed to believe that I would escape my small town. Well I did it, and the future remains ambiguous as ever, but I grow more okay with that.
*Astin and I sprinted home to our families and I spent the next few months living at home, visiting friends, working for my dad, and taking a really amazing trip with some of the raddest people I know down to California to visit some other really rad people. I also went backpacking for the first time. I almost died, or at least felt like it, but getting to the top of the mountain was definitely worth it. :D
*I got a job, totally unrelated to my major but related to pretty much all the jobs I've ever had, working with 10-15 year old boys. Discipline has definitely always been my weakness. Since I have a pretty strong personality, you would think that discipline comes naturally, but it actually makes me sick. Therefore, this job is gradually changing that. I don't know how long I'll last, but I'm giving it a good go while I'm there.
*I became co-president of the rollerblading club I invented.
*I moved in with 3 people I already loved and one that I had never really met but now I love her too. Partially because we are probably both clinically insane.
*I got trapped on the top of a mountain in a snowstorm. Luckily I was in a suburban with 3 other people and a very smelly, wet dog.
*I ran my first 5K (about 3 miles). I am not aware that I have ever run 3 miles consecutively, so this was an accomplishment for me.
*Various friends have come to visit and The Sisterhood even had an almost-complete reunion.
*I got to celebrate Christmas with my family after being apart last year. And my grandma ended the year with a bang by eating a Hollywood Stars Liver Treat for dogs.

2009 was a big year. I honestly don't know if I'm a better person. I know I learned some things, and I know I should have learned others. Since I'm making that post-college relationships transition a year later than most of my friends, it's been a learning year. It makes me think that people who understand who you are, appreciate it, and want to see you grow are much rarer than I originally assumed. I am more aware of the smaller moments that are spaced further apart now. I'm pretty pumped about the people in my life who are those good things for me.

Hollywood Stars

I'm wondering if I get a prize for 100 blogs. I'd like a medal. I much prefer medals over trophies except when I prefer trophies over medals.

Christmas this year went off pretty smoothly. Nothing wild and fancy, just a small family gathering. Padre was in rare form this year busting out many hilarious moments including when he decided to adopt my sister's phrase--"frickin' deluxe". You don't know the full scope of that phrase till it comes out of the mouth of your 53 year old father. There was also the moment when he looked at the package of Milky Ways he received for backpacking trips and declared, "Oh Milky Ways! We will have many special adventures!"

Hands down, however, the highlight of hilarity came from my grandmother, who at 86, had forgotten to turn up her hearing aids. I handed her a box of dog treats and said, "Grandma, our dog got some treats for Christmas, you should feed him one." She responded with, "Mmm! Smells nice!" I said, "I don't think so. They're liver treats." It was taking her a moment to get settled, so I turned my attention elsewhere. Seconds later, I heard the booming voice of my father shouting, "GRANDMA! GRANDMA!" As she is very hard-of-hearing, it took her a minute to stop chewing. "What?" That's when my dad shouted, horrified, "That's dog food!" My grandma paused to spit out the wet, half-chewed treat into her hand and examine it closer. Then she fed it to the dog who saw nothing wrong with the scenario. As she smacked the remains in her mouth she said, "Hm! Tastes just fine to me!" Oh g-ma.

Odds and Ends

I realize that most of my work stories are "had-to-be-there" types. But I think this one will transfer.

I am driving our oversized van full of kids. We have a lot of Jewish students so one student pops his contemporary CD into the CD player. First off, Hebrew rap is an experience in itself. Secondly, all the other boys were whining. Then a song, very obviously still in Hebrew, yet with a miniscule mariachi feel to it, came on. One of the kids pipes up:

"I feel like I'm in frickin Mexico!"
Me, dryly - "Good. Enjoy the sun."
Student, needing a comeback, "No, like reTARded Mexico."

I was not actually aware of that geographical region. But this is the sort of thing I listen to every day.

In other news, I have a lovely bunch of friends and I got to celebrate Christmas with them this weekend. Let's just say that a lot of interesting joke material comes from high pressure games like Catch Phrase. I'm also pretty sure that all my presents are wrapped. Whoop!

Cranky

I have written 90 posts, says blogspot. Who knew? Anyway, this blog is devoted to my current state of crankiness. Really, ranting about one's personal whines on an internet blog is pretty high on my pet peeves list, but reflecting on this double standard is only making me crankier.

It started tonight at work, when some of the kids were being royal pains in the ass. Oh and, by the way, the day after I blogged that last one, some boys, including "stan" were involved in a very spiteful act against me. And another kid told me my calm voice was antagonizing him. Whatever.

I read this Amy Adams/Meryl Streep interview the other day and Adams said something great about wasting her whole 20's looking for that special person. I think she's spot-on. Women's lib has come a long way, but ladies, I think we settle it a lot of ways. And it makes me cranky to wonder if I'm falling into that trap. The ideal for the female life should not be to find Mr. Wonderful and have a fabulous career while we're at it (because, yes, we've moved forward and career is now included in the package). I want to be enough by myself. That nonsense about meeting the person who completes you makes me throw up. It should be more like, "I'm complete, but life is a whole lot more interesting with you around." I'm frustrated because I think I AM enough and that I should really enjoy this semi-carefree time of life. So why, then, do I still wish I had someone to share it with? Now, let's not get carried away. I definitely am not ready for anything serious...some recent events only reinforced that. Just "a more significant companion" as someone recently put it. But.

My work schedule limits me to relationships I already have because I don't have the right time slots to go make new ones. And all my relationships have changed, anyway, leaving me feeling like one more appointment everyone has to cram into a slot. So I'm cranky. Cranky that I feel like a little life raft floating in a big ocean...caught in between the religious ideals that used to help me interpret life, and the big question mark that leaves everything open. Feeling like I'm everywhere and nowhere and too much and not enough.

Sounds quite dramatic, but cranky is the perfect word, because it's just that. A temporary emotion that usually gets better after enough consecutive nights of good sleep. And knowing that other people will be subjected to my embarassing psychobabble is a great way to send myself off to bed.

Trying to put together my desk chair and failing also makes me cranky.